Kindergarten

It is absolutely amazing, my Sweet Pea starting Kindergarten.  I’m blown away just thinking that she will be in school now until she is an adult.  The milestones of childhood (motherhood too) come as if no time has passed between them. And yet here I am, another year older and not feeling too much wiser. In some ways, I still feel like a kid.

As I walked my daughter into her kindergarten class this morning, memories of my own childhood flooded my mind and I felt nostalgia that I didn’t quite expect.  The smell of crayons, the nametag on her little cubby, the colorful pictures adorning every wall, and the tiny desks and chairs.  I vividly remember my first day of school and today I relived that through the eyes of my child.

I met one of my very best friends (we are still friends today) the day I started school. This morning, Sweet Pea walked into her class and immediately she and another little girl became friends. In seconds they were sitting next to each other, chatting away. They were amazed that they were both 5. I chucked and tears almost came to my eyes.  As they walked about the room together, making sure they each had a chance to do all the activities, I remembered my lasting friendship and I smiled. For the first time I thought to myself "she will be ok.  She is going to do just fine."

It’s so strange, the things that come to your mind as a parent.  I find myself thinking, “Will she know to ask to go to the potty? Will she line up when the teacher says to do so? Is she going to understand the way we behave in school?” and on, and on, and on.  We went to school; we somehow learned what to do. I need to give her more credit.  She will find her way.

The day your child is born, you are in control. Your baby is handed to you in a little bundle and you are sent on your merry way.  You venture out into the unknown and begin raising them.  No instruction manual, no technical support.  They learn, you learn. They make mistakes and so do you. You both fall and you both get back up again.  You begin teaching them how to live life, how to be the best version of themselves, and how to be independent. As that independence begins to grow, you realize that means you must start giving up control.  Today that was the hardest part.  I know this is just the beginning and that she is still my little girl.  I know there are so many more milestones and there will be many more days like today. Days where I have to let go so she can be who she is. And I know she will be fine because really, SHE is teaching me how to live, SHE is helping me to be the best version of myself, and SHE is showing me how to be independent. If she can do at that at 5 years old, she is off to do great things.

Happy first day of school my little girl! Mommy knows you are going to be great!